Me, Writing

NaNoWriMo

You've probably heard of it, but in case not, November is National Novel Writing Month. The basic idea is to write a novel, or 50,000 words, in 30 days. It averages out to 1667 words a day which is very doable. In fact, it seems almost too easy. And that's how it gets you. I… Continue reading NaNoWriMo

Writing

The Listener

This is an older piece, but has never been posted here before, so I figured, what the hell?   I am The Listener. You talk, I listen. What’s up? Nothing, nothing at all. It’s at the core of my existence, something I’ve done for as long as I can remember, Listening. I can’t imagine being… Continue reading The Listener

Halloween, Me

It Didn’t Say Juicy On The Butt

Since it’s the spookiest season of all, I thought I might share a little true tale of horror with you because, Dear Reader, I feel I haven’t revealed how truly fucked up I am yet. I would preface this by saying that yes, I believe in certain supernatural things, but I also believe that I… Continue reading It Didn’t Say Juicy On The Butt

Me

Nothing In Between

I unabashedly label myself a feminist. I’ve experienced some terrible treatment due to my gender, including when I was pretty young, but I know I’ve grown up in what is historically one of the best countries/times for women, so I’ve been wondering how I became so passionate. Injustice has always bothered me, and there’s never really… Continue reading Nothing In Between

Me, Rant

Also I Hate The Word “Fleek”

Some people have really strong feelings about things that they really shouldn't. Like, some people HATE pumpkin spice as if pumpkin spice personally hurt them. Like pumpkin spice broke up with them via text message. Like pumpkin spice punched their mom in the face. Like pumpkin spice used the key they gave it "for emergencies… Continue reading Also I Hate The Word “Fleek”

Cats

Questions Only A Cat Can Answer

Why are you so obsessed with the toilet? Even after the great plunge of two ought seventeen, you still insist on challenging a one-handed me to keep you at bay. How can you differentiate the toilet from, say, the couch? Both are sat upon, both are read upon. How do you know this seat is… Continue reading Questions Only A Cat Can Answer

Husband, Me

I Moved In

My Husband and I met on the internet as many an internet-people do. We went on two dates before I began spending long weekends at his tiny apartment. We were meant to be, you might say. However, the state of that tiny apartment when we met wasn’t saying that. Let me describe it to you.… Continue reading I Moved In

Health, Me

World Obesity Day

For a number of years I was obese. I would argue that I didn't look it, and I didn't have a lot of the symptoms that come to mind when one hears that word, but at 190 lbs and 5'4", I was clinically obese according to the Body Mass Index. The weight crept on slowly,… Continue reading World Obesity Day

Me

This Thing Keeps Happening

People keep inciting aggression against me when they’re the ones who have done something objectively wrong. It’s probably a larger statement on humanity: people are entitled dickbags. They took my advice to stop giving a shit about one another long before I gave it, apparently. They really believe they’re infallible, and if you so much… Continue reading This Thing Keeps Happening

I Just Don't Fucking Understand, Me

Things I Don’t Fucking Understand: Lysol Aerosol Spray

Most of us have probably used it at some point in our lives with varying degrees of satisfaction. Personally, I feel like a spritz or two of any scented Lysol on shoes or bedsheets is quite enough. It has come to my attention, however, this feeling isn’t universal. Some people appear to love Lysol Aerosol… Continue reading Things I Don’t Fucking Understand: Lysol Aerosol Spray