Thoughts While Watching 1999’s “She’s All That” For The First Time In Probably 10+ Years

(Note, I only started taking screenshots at the very end. Sorry.)

No one looks like that in high school. Not in the 90s anyway.

Matthew goddamned Lillard.

Did Usher actually attend this school as a student? Or was he just the school’s hired DJ? Why does a school need a DJ, hired or otherwise?

The things the edgy girls say to Laney in art class are SO FUCKING MEAN that I almost did a spit take. That shit is HARSH and a million times worse than anything Taylor does.

If I wasn’t attracted to women before Mac, I sure as fuck was after.

“Supersize my balls.”

I can’t tell if it’s a wig or not, but Laney’s long hair is weird. It is a wig, isn’t it?

Simon and I know exactly same amount about alcohol.

“What is Shampoo?”

Rachel Leigh Cook coming down the stairs to “Kiss Me” is i-con-ic.

“GIVE IT TO ME BABY!”

Petition to bring back the man-titties-out soccer shirts!

Zack’s blonde friend really takes a turn in the second act. Hey, that’s Paul Walker! Aw, takes a turn…oh no, I made myself sad.

Was Usher actually ever on set with any of the principle cast?

LANEY USES POOL PARTS IN HER PAINTINGS OMG WHAT A SMART FUCKING CHOICE FOR THE PROP DEPARTMENT. ALSO HOW IS THAT NOT A PIECE OF HER IN HER ARTWORK, MS. ART TEACHER?

Zack’s internal struggle is beautiful.

Was this movie sponsored by The Real World?

DO YOU GUYS REMEMBER THE REAL WORLD?

Did anyone go to a school where people freestyled at all let alone about who was going to be prom queen? Do you think they wrote those freestyles and then titled the movie or decided on the title and then wrote it into the rap?

The pube pizza scene was something I had blocked out of my memory 19 years ago, and I am pissed off I’ve been subjected to it once again.

Their one use of “fuck” is spot on.

I really appreciate how they portrayed both Zack and Laney’s dads.

The prom photographer is all of us.

Why is Lil’ Kim in this movie if she doesn’t have any lines??

This guy’s hair:

hair
Inspiration: Pineapple

Taylor is wearing butterfly clips, face glitter, and gold lipstick to prom. Goddess.

taylor
Get on my level, Zack!

Usher implies he taught the students the choreography that the “dance team” performs during prom which suggests he may also be the dance instructor at the school? This weirdly makes sense to me, but I’m pissed off we never got a spin off called They’re All That And A Bag of Potato Chips staring Usher, Lil’ Kim, and Gabrielle Union going to and winning state.

Basically, the concept of the Usher DJ is a really novel idea, and I love it.

usher
WHY WOULD I EVER WANT TO ESCAPE THIS, COMPUTER, WHYYYYYYY???

This guy’s hair again:

this guy
I’m sorry, dancer, you didn’t deserve this.

She’s All That is basically Grease at this point, and I am here for it.

The dancers are wearing dance shoes. No matter what kind of dress they have on, they’ve all got Broadwayesque boxy heels on. I’m also here for that.

They should have made a live action Captain Planet with these guys as Earth and Fire:

cp
RIP Mr. Walker

Unpopular Opinion: Taylor deserved to be prom queen. She’s clearly going to peak in high school, she needed it more.

The race for Laney’s virginity admittedly makes me uncomfortable, but I’m unsure how this could have been written better. At least it works out well with Laney defending her own honor.

Usher is literally credited as “Campus DJ.” This doesn’t answer any of my questions.

Final Thought: This is an A+, high quality, 100% amazing FILM, and I recommend it to all of you right this very instant.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s