Today All I Can Think About Is The Tree

My goddamned phone won’t let me think about anything else, so today, apparently, all my ire and anxiety is reserved solely for the 50 foot piece of nature that literally and figuratively uprooted and just fucked so much of my shit up.

You’d think I would be concerned with the election, but I already expended all my “oh, god, we’ve truly become Amerikkka” energy in the last 48 hours. I was determined that today would be a better day, but a couple things didn’t let that happen, namely the overzealousness that is the realty industry.

We were under contract to sell our house. It was going to close December 1st. Then a hurricane happened and dropped a log through the attic right into the master bedroom. Needless to say, the house is off the market while we wait for the insurance company and the work to get done. But because the realty industry is frankly VERY fucked up, I have been getting call after call after call (and even some emails!) from every realty group known to man trying to get my house back on the market.

I finally screamed at the Century 21 asshole who acted like I was the jerk for asking how he got my number (which I asked really politely by the way), telling him I don’t need to be reminded every two seconds that a giant tree fell through my roof.

I’ve been doing a lot of that lately, yelling at people that is, but here’s the thing: I have been kind and quiet and forgiving and just disgustingly nice my whole life, and do you know where that’s got me? At the bottom of every list, the back of every mind, and left cleaning up after every other person around me.

And I am fucking done.

I’ve watched people be huge assholes about things that they have absolutely not needed to be and then be treated like a fucking king afterwards. Meanwhile I’ve just said, “no, it’s okay, don’t worry, it’s fine, blah fucking blah” every time someone else legit fucks up, and then I just have to deal with the consequences, stuck waiting behind all the dicks who yelled about something superfluous but got their way anyway.

No more!

I don’t intend to be rude if it’s not called for, but if you vulture call me and remind me one more goddamned time that the universe is yet again screwing me and heaping on loads of stress where it’s not needed, guess who it’s all getting unloaded on? Yeah, your dumb ass.

And while I’m at it, from now on when someone fucks up or tries to screw me over, I refuse to allow it. I will yell if I have to, but I am not sitting around anymore, waiting at the end of the line quietly, smiling, coddling people who want to just skate by and bow down to bigger assholes.

I WILL BE THE BIGGEST ASSHOLE.

So anyway, the tree. I said I’d post some pictures. If you’re morbidly curious, here they are. You know, for fun!

That last one is my favorite. It’s like the tree saying “FUCK YOU” by dropping branch straight into this other room. When Husband and I saw it in person we literally laughed out loud because that’s all you can really do, ya know?

I think my give less fucks attitude is evolving from this, and honestly I just don’t care anymore.