So I’m a nerd, and I love D&D. I will admit I constantly forget the rules, know very little of the lore, and never have an inkling about what a monster is going to do besides knowing about these kinds of creatures from myth outside of Dungeons and Dragons, but I still love D&D. I’m a fake gamer girl, I guess, but what the fuck ever.

Husband and I recently got invited to a new campaign with a small group of just some of the best people I know (so funny, so talented, so heartfelt), so I got the opportunity to craft a new character which is the absolute tits for me–I can spend hours on the character creation screen of any video game, so making up Emi has just been an utter delight. And I figured why not share her here too?

Emi Bounder

Race: Satyr
Class: Bard
Alignment: Chaotic Good
Background: Far Traveler

Strength: 13
Dexterity: 16
Constitution: 13
Intelligence: 12
Wisdom: 13
Charisma: 18

Emi Bounder was born into the Dionion clan of satyrs in the Methwood (yeah, this is a place on the map). She grew up carefree and inquisitive and frequently “ran away” to Heptios on the Bay of Chessenta for excitement but always returned. She opted to focus on the more frivolous skills of music, painting, and theatre, though that was typical of her kind.

When she was eighteen, most of her clan was wiped out by Skuthosiin the Venomous, an evil green dragon who hated the mirthful, loud ways of the satyrs. (I don’t know if this dragon existed at the time of our campaign, I just picked out the most evil thing I could find in the area.) Emi was on one of her sprees in Chessenta when this happened, lucky to have survived, but devastated to lose her family and friends.

Forlorn and alone, she wandered the Methwood for days until she was found by a mysterious knight who offered her shelter, food, and care in one of his many keeps in exchange for her service in the form of a signed contract. She knew very little about this man as he always wore a helmet, but she could make out his oddly large teeth beneath it. Incredibly wealthy and seemingly jovial, she trusted him and signed. He went only by name The Son of Bran.

Emi went to live in a small keep in the port city of Hlath, joining four other women already in her mysterious benefactor’s service:

• Meadow Browncliff, a leopard tabaxi with an excitable, loud, and fun-loving disposition, but could be quite scary when needed
• Vadania Xiloscient, a high elf who appreciated the finer things in life, knew her way around nobles, and was, in a word, quite posh
• Jingee, a red (ginger) tiefling who was as likely to charm someone as she was to turn them completely off, but either way they usually ended up run through
• Mel Teeth Breaker, an orc with a propensity for all things physical and sporty, the group’s muscle and fitness trainer

Together, the five were, you could say, a spicy bunch.

They were sent on small missions across the Sea of Fallen Stars during which they would sometimes run into other bands of travelers or solo adventurers also under the benefaction of the Son of Bran like Mic, the jaguar tabaxi who had crazy big lips or a group of punky archers who called themselves the Sex Crossbows. Typically the girls retrieved lost items or rescued prisoners, each task increasing a bit in difficulty.

A few years into their contract under The Son of Bran (which none were quite sure the true length of), they were tasked with retrieving an ancient, powerful object of mysterious origin and form. The group disagreed about taking on the work at all, those of them familiar with The Object knowing it would be nigh impossible to acquire, but others, like Emi, believed they could do anything through the power of friendship. Ultimately they agreed to go after The Object, their debt to The Son of Bran grater than any of their objections.

While on the mission, each member was nearly killed, and though they eventually did acquire The Object, the experience ruined their trust in one another, spiritually disbanding them. The night before they reached their home keep to present The Object to The Son of Bran, Jingee disappeared. Finding both the tiefling and The Object gone the next morning, Mel, Vadania, and Meadow also decided to flee, heading west into Faerun and away from The Son of Bran’s reach. They tried to convince Emi to do the same, but being fey and not humanoid like the others, she could not break the enchanted bond for fear of losing her magic and possibly her life.

Alone once again, Emi delivered the news to The Son of Bran. She expected him to be angry, but instead he tasked her to go out into the world, grow stronger, record her travels, and report back to him. She would eventually find the others, he told her, and when she was powerful enough she would be able to retrieve The Object for him once again.

So Emi is now traveling across Faerun in hopes of finding her lost ex-friends (to get the band back together) and rediscovering The Object that The Son of Bran desires. What has become of her previous party and who even has The Object, she does not know, and the further she travels from The Son of Bran she wonders if any of it: information on her old friends or even The Object itself, should really be returned to him at all. But she tries not to think about that too much–the world is so full of wonder and excitement, better to focus on all the fun here and now and not whatever the far-off future might bring.