Me In Three Characters

This was a short-lived, though perhaps ongoing (at the time of posting this), Twitter meme that I am riding all the way to the bank (the bank of Ashley’s blog, that is). That’s right, I posted it on Twitter and Instagram, and now it’s here too. So, here’s how I’d describe myself in three characters.

Note: they’re all sitcom brunettes, and I’m well aware of the one-noted-ness because that’s another aspect of my personality, I’m just this one thing really, so yeah.

Liz Lemon is the first television character I ever clicked with. 30 Rock came out right after I started college, and I wanted to go into TV production at the time (I mean, I still do, it’s just an evolving desire), but the closest thing I could both realistically (and emotionally) major in was English Literature (which I don’t regret, it’s just what happened). So, I lived vicariously through Liz who was surrounded by chaos and constantly failing which was also how I often felt. Liz wants so hard to be good and do the right thing but ends up either completely blowing it because she’s selfish, or sticking to her morals and getting screwed over. It’s a fun tightrope to walk because you fail either way about 99% of the time, and that’s how I saw and still see myself. Plus there’s all the binge eating, sarcasm, nerdosity, and misplaced judgment.

I just started watching New Girl recently, but Jessica Day speaks to the person I want to be. She’s kind and caring and authentically quirky, and while, like Liz, she wants to do go, she tries a hell of a lot harder, often to her own detriment. I also sing-narrate most of my day, cry because of Taylor Swift, and I thought about going into teaching at one time until I realized that I’m not strong enough to handle children. Jess wants everybody to get along, and that really sums up the most placid and servile parts of my personality.

Friends is like a first love: it’s nostalgic, familiar, and when you look back on it even the parts that don’t 100% hold up are still okay enough to not ruin the whole thing. I picked up a lot of personality traits from the main cast from watching it while it actually aired, words like “wonky” and “floofy,” screaming “I know!” in agreement, or guessing “a ghost” as the answer to any question, and ironing out whole life philosophies like there are no unselfish good deeds, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try. I used to think I was most like Phoebe, and though I never had a phase where I thought I was Rachel, I realize now I’m a Monica Geller through and through. Obsessive, competitive, and ambitious, yet self-loathing, deeply flawed, and irrational. It’s like the best and the worst parts of myself, all in one. She cares deeply about people but is way too sure she knows what’s best for them, she has to be in charge and is quite good at it despite that it runs her ragged and is pretty unhealthy, and she’s often screwed over by the universe–not always in a huge, life shattering way (though sometimes, yeah), but in ways that end up justifying all that type-A, overly-prepared mom energy she has.

So, that’s it. Three brunettes who usually wear glasses, but I’m pretty sure my life would be shot single-cam, mockumentary style.

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